Here is what I know, the way that you speak to your child can change the course of their life. The words we sow into our children can guide them into a position to be their higher selves, or place them into a position of only wishing they could overcome those barriers that are holding them back from the person they believe they are destined to be. I speak from experience; as I often struggle to use my voice. These insecurities arise from not having much encouragement in my household; not purposely, but in ways that have trickled down from my mother’s own childhood experiences and possibly even her father’s experiences as well.
My mother was raised by a single father, he raised 6 children alone and empathetic communication, understanding, and a nurturing lifestyle wasn’t necessarily at the forefront of his to-do list of raising children. He had many other things to worry about; such as feeding, disciplining, and working hard to keep 6 children alive and healthy. His moments with his children were filled with frustration that emerged from tiredness and stress. Needless to say, while my mother always remained calm in my own childhood, she often structured her words in ways that felt doubtful and intimidating.
Instead of feeling like a mother, she has always felt more like a sister to me in my youth; today it’s different, as I have began to have a better understanding of her story and how the seeds sown into her childhood had been the seeds that had sprouted into those bitter moments that filled me with the many insecurities that I still struggle with today. I often wonder who I would be if I hadn’t had to heal the little girl within. If I were given the “confidence blueprint.” How life, money, love, and career would have all been completely different experiences than the ones I’ve had thus far.
Trust me, the way we speak to our children impact them for the rest of their lives. Speak life into them, show them confidence (even if you have to fake it), check their temperature about how they feel about themselves, speak words of affirmations to them throughout the day. When we speak of breaking generational curses, these are the sort of curses I imagine. Those moments in childhood that can either create an easier path for our children into adulthood by means of mental, financial, spiritual, etc. Those thoughts that you believe would have set you up on an easier journey if only you had those seeds of opportunity planted into you at an earlier age. Here is that opportunity, as mothers, as parents, as community members, to not take the power of words lightly. To sow seeds, to plant power, to break barriers, to encourage our children through every milestone. To understand the lasting impact of words and how they can dilute a growing brain with the substance it needs to flourish or with weeds that will eventually need clearing.
Written by : Lakischa Smith